The scrollEpisode 53
I was so unlike myself once anger and agony conspired against me .... I was worn out .... days on the road in vain .... I could barely feel hunger or thirst ..... I could barely feel .... The road was long enough and my demons could entertain me with the ugliest yet the most realistic thoughts .... days in apathy and madness to forget about how the journey commenced a fortnight earlier ..... and what I have learnt is once a lone wolf one can never be a lamb again .... and once a lone wolf one must take a wound after the other until the final blow gets them to close the lid denying a world of isness to infiltrate their world of nothingness ..... and new eyes to see what has been done .... when life starts to make sense and everything falls in place or so I hope .... in the yester world I had soothers ..... I was scared of being feared when I am seen through ..... like a hunchback on a pedestal I was waiting for the first stone ..... but from my pedestal everything looked small below .. insignificant ..... like gods I was above all .... but I was alone .... one day I was left a scroll .... a few words enough to let me take a final blow with pleasure ..... I have known there is someone who can sail in a sea of confusion in my head with me .... I knew there was someone along the way or at least there would be someone .... I feared being touched or seen ..... I feared being touched by the light itself .... Above all .... I feared my fear itself ..... the face of terror I have seen on every one I met .... and on those who used to matter long before my yester self was gone .... the scroll had me in words I could never relate to .... because I was blinded by my fear of fear itself .... and thus the scroll was placed in my soul for eternity even after I woke up as a blind crow.
